it's a sweep!

In an unprecedented move, the Heisman Trophy Trust will not be sending ballots to the traditional Heisman Trophy voters this year. Tim Tebow, Colt McCoy et. al. can relax and watch the ceremony with the rest of America on the couch, as it has already been announced that this year's winner will be Barak Obama.

FOX and CW are now scrambling for programming, as the reality show titans, American Idol and America's Next Top Model, have also mailed it in...Barak Obama.

In other news, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences today announced it has awarded the Oscar for Best Picture for the upcoming year. Yes, it's Barak Obama. Responding to criticism that Obama isn't actually a motion picture, the Academy defended its decision, saying that Obama's rise from poor black child raised by his grandmother to the Presidency instills such hope in small ideas that dream of one day becoming blockbuster movies, that his influence was just impossible to ignore.

People magazine fans are now waiting with baited breath for the announcement of the sexiest man alive. Who could it be?