Wednesday, May 17, 2006

the emergency room...take 26

I really don't know if it's take 26. I lost count somewhere around 10.

The youngster wants these things called Heeleys. His buddy got them for his birthday. The youngster saw 'em. The youngster wore 'em. He's jonesin' real bad. They're basically shoes with a wide wheel in the heel. They are also the source of our latest in a series of trips to the emergency room.

I came home from work to the youngster moaning on the couch. No, there wasn't some hot young teenage female there with him, so I figured it was an injury related thing. It seems he was wearing his friend's heeleys when someone's dog came out of the house. Big dog, or so I'm told. The youngster freaked and started running down the street. The dog followed, probably in an attempt to lick him to death. The youngster slipped and fell on his wrist..the same one he injured a year ago at a skate park (which was emergency room..take 22 or so). I walked in and asked him what was wrong. He spent the next three minutes in a sympathy pulling, agonized effort to get up and walk ten steps to where I was and tell me he just got home, was wearing the Heeleys, the dog thing, busted his ass and it all hurts, and the wrist is the same one he hurt last year and he heard a pop. Oh joy.

So I packed him and me off to the nearest hospital, conveniently only one exit north on the Interstate. For being out in the middle of nothing, it is nice that someone knew of the youngster and figured plopping a hospital near the middle of nothing could be a profitable venture. We got to the hospital and.....life goes into slow motion.

I brought a book, because I've been through the drill before. We checked in at 7:15. The place wasn't terribly busy but there were about five people seen before us. I don't know exactly when we got seen first for the triage part, but it was after 9:00 before they took X-rays. We didn't even have a room to sit in. The youngster got to sit on a cot in the hall. We waited and I read. I watched the two E.R. doctors have a discussion about the one doctor's golf game with someone that could turn into a business opportunity. It was after 10:00 when the doctor, who apparently has game from his earlier conversation, came to see the youngster to tell him he didn't thing he broke anything but wanted to check one more thing (after feeling around his wrist and seeing what hurt and what didn't). It was 10:30 before he came back and assured us nothing was broke and another 15 minutes before the charge nurse came with our paperwork so we could leave. I almost finished the book.

Total time inside the hospital...three and a half hours, to get one X-ray and find out nothing was wrong. I mean, Jesus, Mary and Marcus Welby, am I the only one who thinks that a bit excessive? (Yeah, the book was Larry the Cable Guy's, so he's influencin' my writing...not a fact to be particularly proud of, but there you have it.) It was daylight when we got there and way past the youngster's bedtime when we left. Was it worth the time and co-pay to get the peace of mind to know nothing's wrong? Sure. Did it really have to take anywhere near that long?

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