the youngster, grades, sports, and there never seems to be a right answer
It's softball season at the youngster's school, and he tried out...and he made the team. Unfortunately he doesn't have the grades to play, so he's suspended.
We went through this last year. If you are a frequent lumberyard reader, you know we deal with ADD, and his seeming inability to come home knowing what he has for homework...and therefore never getting it all done. We've tried numerous solutions, but this never seems to get solved for any length of time. Last year he made the team, and didn't get to play a single game until the last two, but since he was also unable to practice with the team all that time, made token appearances. I didn't want to go through that this year. We discussed whether or not he should even try out. He's having a hard enough time in school without throwing softball in the mix. He decided to forgo softball, and I thought the matter was settled...until the actual day of tryouts.
Tryouts came, and he called from school, begging to go, so we relented, still throwing in the grade issue. "I'll bring them up!" he said, and we hoped. To be honest, there has been some progress, but not enough to make me or his teachers happy.
So we got a call from the coach, who is also a family friend. The gist was, the youngster made the team, but his grades will keep him from playing. Do you want him to play or should I give the spot to someone else?
My first inclination was, give the spot to someone else. He has enough going on and can't handle what he has...let alone this. The coach countered with the fact being on the team gives him incentive to bring his grades up, and that's true. If he brings them up, he gets to play softball for the school. If I tell him he can't play, it just makes him feel worse.
So we're leaning toward letting him "be" on the team, but I still don't know if that's the right thing to do. I would love for him to bring his grades up and have a great softball season, but that kind of ending never seems to come our way. I think we're too far away from Hollywood for that. Still, I feel like I should give him the opportunity for that to happen, but that makes me feel like a selfish bastard. Some other boy won't make the team, because I want to give my son an incentive, but if I don't, we keep making matters worse. Sometimes, there just is no right answer.
We went through this last year. If you are a frequent lumberyard reader, you know we deal with ADD, and his seeming inability to come home knowing what he has for homework...and therefore never getting it all done. We've tried numerous solutions, but this never seems to get solved for any length of time. Last year he made the team, and didn't get to play a single game until the last two, but since he was also unable to practice with the team all that time, made token appearances. I didn't want to go through that this year. We discussed whether or not he should even try out. He's having a hard enough time in school without throwing softball in the mix. He decided to forgo softball, and I thought the matter was settled...until the actual day of tryouts.
Tryouts came, and he called from school, begging to go, so we relented, still throwing in the grade issue. "I'll bring them up!" he said, and we hoped. To be honest, there has been some progress, but not enough to make me or his teachers happy.
So we got a call from the coach, who is also a family friend. The gist was, the youngster made the team, but his grades will keep him from playing. Do you want him to play or should I give the spot to someone else?
My first inclination was, give the spot to someone else. He has enough going on and can't handle what he has...let alone this. The coach countered with the fact being on the team gives him incentive to bring his grades up, and that's true. If he brings them up, he gets to play softball for the school. If I tell him he can't play, it just makes him feel worse.
So we're leaning toward letting him "be" on the team, but I still don't know if that's the right thing to do. I would love for him to bring his grades up and have a great softball season, but that kind of ending never seems to come our way. I think we're too far away from Hollywood for that. Still, I feel like I should give him the opportunity for that to happen, but that makes me feel like a selfish bastard. Some other boy won't make the team, because I want to give my son an incentive, but if I don't, we keep making matters worse. Sometimes, there just is no right answer.
Labels: Family Stuff
John put this out here at 9:20 AM
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