Paranormal Activity
I guess i should preface this with...I'm not a scary movie person. I don't watch them. I don't enjoy them. I'm a comedy guy...or an action thriller guy. I like to be made to laugh or be wowed...and horror flicks don't do that for me.
Friday night the youngster came to me with a request.
"Dad, there's this movie I want to see with my friends, but it's rated 'R' for language. Can I go?"
The conversation went from there into what movie, and who wanted to go, and they needed an adult to take them and buy the tickets, since they're all 15 or 16. It's a really scary movie, and pretty much, they're all daring each other to see it. After some research, I decided it was OK, so I agreed to take the lot of them to see Paranormal Activity on Saturday night.
Mom-in-law was in town, so I arranged to take the kids, buy their tickets and leave to meet the wife and mom-in-law at a nearby restaurant for dinner. Another kid's mom was going to pick them up after the movie ended. So far, so good....almost.
We get to the theater, and the attendant informs me I have to have a ticket, and I have to see the movie with them. The kids came in more than one car, and the number I'm now 'accompanying' has increased dramatically. They buy me a ticket, and we discuss sneaking me out after the lights go down. Inside the movie, more of their friends appear with two other adults. The adults all have the same plan. Let the movie start and leave. So far, so good...almost.
The lights go down and one mom leaves, and about 5 minutes later, returns. The movie theater naziiiiierrrrrr...employees followed her...to the concession stand...into the rest room..and informed her they expected her to return to the theater with the kids she brought, or they were throwing them out. I called the wife and told her to go ahead and eat with her mom. I was trapped.
And trapped I was...in the most boring piece of crap movie I've seen in a very long time. It was about as stupid as another movie I took the youngster to...when he was seven...the Pokemon movie. It was equally scary, too, but the Pokemon movie moved faster, and with that one, I knew what I was getting into. This time, I had no intention of seeing a movie, particularly a really bad boring one instead of having a decent meal.
This wasn't scary. I don't think it kept any of those kids up that night. In fact, it was hard staying awake while I was still in the theater. You spend the majority of the movie watching two people sleep. I was jealous. It crawled at a snail's pace, and I kept looking at my watch, wondering how much more I had to endure. The recurring thought I had was....I could be eating steak right now. After it was over, one of the kids, in an effort to rationalize a decent reason for spending $10 on what he just sat through, said, "Well, it did startle you a few times." Sure, and if you would have stayed home, you could sit in a chair and have one of your friends clap his hands behind you when you don't expect it. You'd be just as startled and $10 richer. Bottom line, that's 98 minutes of my life I'm not getting back....and that's the most horrifying thing about this supposed horror flick.
Friday night the youngster came to me with a request.
"Dad, there's this movie I want to see with my friends, but it's rated 'R' for language. Can I go?"
The conversation went from there into what movie, and who wanted to go, and they needed an adult to take them and buy the tickets, since they're all 15 or 16. It's a really scary movie, and pretty much, they're all daring each other to see it. After some research, I decided it was OK, so I agreed to take the lot of them to see Paranormal Activity on Saturday night.
Mom-in-law was in town, so I arranged to take the kids, buy their tickets and leave to meet the wife and mom-in-law at a nearby restaurant for dinner. Another kid's mom was going to pick them up after the movie ended. So far, so good....almost.
We get to the theater, and the attendant informs me I have to have a ticket, and I have to see the movie with them. The kids came in more than one car, and the number I'm now 'accompanying' has increased dramatically. They buy me a ticket, and we discuss sneaking me out after the lights go down. Inside the movie, more of their friends appear with two other adults. The adults all have the same plan. Let the movie start and leave. So far, so good...almost.
The lights go down and one mom leaves, and about 5 minutes later, returns. The movie theater naziiiiierrrrrr...employees followed her...to the concession stand...into the rest room..and informed her they expected her to return to the theater with the kids she brought, or they were throwing them out. I called the wife and told her to go ahead and eat with her mom. I was trapped.
And trapped I was...in the most boring piece of crap movie I've seen in a very long time. It was about as stupid as another movie I took the youngster to...when he was seven...the Pokemon movie. It was equally scary, too, but the Pokemon movie moved faster, and with that one, I knew what I was getting into. This time, I had no intention of seeing a movie, particularly a really bad boring one instead of having a decent meal.
This wasn't scary. I don't think it kept any of those kids up that night. In fact, it was hard staying awake while I was still in the theater. You spend the majority of the movie watching two people sleep. I was jealous. It crawled at a snail's pace, and I kept looking at my watch, wondering how much more I had to endure. The recurring thought I had was....I could be eating steak right now. After it was over, one of the kids, in an effort to rationalize a decent reason for spending $10 on what he just sat through, said, "Well, it did startle you a few times." Sure, and if you would have stayed home, you could sit in a chair and have one of your friends clap his hands behind you when you don't expect it. You'd be just as startled and $10 richer. Bottom line, that's 98 minutes of my life I'm not getting back....and that's the most horrifying thing about this supposed horror flick.
Labels: Pop Culture
John put this out here at 12:45 PM
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