you say Torino, I say Turin
More Olympic fun...
So Bode Miller straddles a gate doing the slalom thing and gets DQ'd. Too bad he can't use the pairs figure skating judges. There, if they think you're good enough to win a medal, you can fall on your face, slide across the ice on it, and they just pretend it didn't happen. Anybody else moves their toe the wrong way and it's a gazillion point deduction, but if the judges think you should do better, you can go back out on the ice and get a 'do over', win silver and they'll call you courageous. I mean, you dropped the bitch on her face (or so I heard. I'll admit I'm getting the story second hand from the wife, who is also of the opinion it was "courageous" and "inspiring" and all that, and that I'm raining on her "feel good" olympic story parade.) For this to be even close to legit, whoever came in 3rd, 4th, 5th, etc. must have made bigger mistakes than that, and if they did...what are they doing in the olympics? Did none of them escape without playing zamboni with their teeth? Didn't we revamp the scoring system for this event because it used to be corrupt? Hell, I haven't skated since I was about 12, but I'm thinking I could get through 10 or 15 minutes on the ice without planting my face in it (but I don't know a triple sow cow from a quadruple pig bull either), but I digress. Back to Bode Miller, who doesn't much care if he wins anything, as long as he enjoys his run on an olympic mountain. It's the rest of us who care about that whole "results" thing. It's fun watching Nike spin that sponsorship so it might be worth their while. I'm not saying they can't. Maybe they'll be successful, but it'll take some marketing genius...or maybe like Bode, they're just in it for the fun of it and don't care about results either. Riiiiiight!
I heard the U.S. doesn't have the most medals, but we have the most gold medals. We can fix that. All we need to do is invent a few more sports that nobody else does...yet...like we did that snowboarding halfpipe thing. I love watching it, but you have to admit...it's not that big a deal to dominate the sport when you're the only ones who have been doing it for any length of time. Also, am I the only one who thinks it's funny watching Sven from Sweden doing the thumb and pinkie thing when he finishes a great halfpipe run? I thought that was strictly an American surfer/skater crowd thing. I guess I was wrong. Lastly, I'd hate to be a judge in that thing. How do you justify the idea that, "I liked this guy's flippy twisty thing better than that guy's flippy twisty thing?"
I'm still enjoying it... just with a more cynical smile today.
On the less olympic sporting front, there's our Vice President out quail hunting without a license. I guess he's lucky he didn't shoot any quail, because that would be illegal. As far as I know, you don't need a license to shoot a lawyer, nor is there a limit, so he should be OK there. You can bag as many of those as you like. Now at least I know why politicians are big on gun control. They're the ones who are inept with them.
What's the difference between going on a quail hunt with Dick Cheney and a moonlight drive with Ted Kennedy?
You'll survive the quail hunt.
Until next time....
So Bode Miller straddles a gate doing the slalom thing and gets DQ'd. Too bad he can't use the pairs figure skating judges. There, if they think you're good enough to win a medal, you can fall on your face, slide across the ice on it, and they just pretend it didn't happen. Anybody else moves their toe the wrong way and it's a gazillion point deduction, but if the judges think you should do better, you can go back out on the ice and get a 'do over', win silver and they'll call you courageous. I mean, you dropped the bitch on her face (or so I heard. I'll admit I'm getting the story second hand from the wife, who is also of the opinion it was "courageous" and "inspiring" and all that, and that I'm raining on her "feel good" olympic story parade.) For this to be even close to legit, whoever came in 3rd, 4th, 5th, etc. must have made bigger mistakes than that, and if they did...what are they doing in the olympics? Did none of them escape without playing zamboni with their teeth? Didn't we revamp the scoring system for this event because it used to be corrupt? Hell, I haven't skated since I was about 12, but I'm thinking I could get through 10 or 15 minutes on the ice without planting my face in it (but I don't know a triple sow cow from a quadruple pig bull either), but I digress. Back to Bode Miller, who doesn't much care if he wins anything, as long as he enjoys his run on an olympic mountain. It's the rest of us who care about that whole "results" thing. It's fun watching Nike spin that sponsorship so it might be worth their while. I'm not saying they can't. Maybe they'll be successful, but it'll take some marketing genius...or maybe like Bode, they're just in it for the fun of it and don't care about results either. Riiiiiight!
I heard the U.S. doesn't have the most medals, but we have the most gold medals. We can fix that. All we need to do is invent a few more sports that nobody else does...yet...like we did that snowboarding halfpipe thing. I love watching it, but you have to admit...it's not that big a deal to dominate the sport when you're the only ones who have been doing it for any length of time. Also, am I the only one who thinks it's funny watching Sven from Sweden doing the thumb and pinkie thing when he finishes a great halfpipe run? I thought that was strictly an American surfer/skater crowd thing. I guess I was wrong. Lastly, I'd hate to be a judge in that thing. How do you justify the idea that, "I liked this guy's flippy twisty thing better than that guy's flippy twisty thing?"
I'm still enjoying it... just with a more cynical smile today.
On the less olympic sporting front, there's our Vice President out quail hunting without a license. I guess he's lucky he didn't shoot any quail, because that would be illegal. As far as I know, you don't need a license to shoot a lawyer, nor is there a limit, so he should be OK there. You can bag as many of those as you like. Now at least I know why politicians are big on gun control. They're the ones who are inept with them.
What's the difference between going on a quail hunt with Dick Cheney and a moonlight drive with Ted Kennedy?
You'll survive the quail hunt.
Until next time....
John put this out here at 8:37 AM
1 Comments:
The first Snowboarder to win a mettle was a Canadian. (ok, so that is like an American, just further north) The guy got caught with traces of Marijauna in his urine. shocking!!!!
That was 1998, I think.
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