Barnyard

I haven't seen the movie Barnyard, but I have seen the previews. It looks cute and all, but I have an issue.

I'm pretty much a city boy, OK? I lived on a farm once in my life. My dad was in the Air Force and we spent a few years in Germany in the early 60's. While waiting for base housing to open up, we lived in the attic of a farmhouse with a German family. One of the few memories I have is of being on the wrong end of a cow with diarrhea when I was about three years old. I didn't say it was a pleasant memory. It points up my farming prowess though, which is non-existent.

Most of my 'cow' expertise comes from one of two places...my grill, or my plate...but, even I know a cow is female. There are no 'boy' cows, with udders and the like. Boy cows are bulls...with bullhorns and bullshit. I know seahorses are kinda weird in that the male has babies, but males of a bovine persuasion are not equipped to give milk. The movie is chock full of cows...'boy' cows (not to be confused with cowboys, which do exist)..with deep 'boy' cow voices and mommy and daddy cows and...udders, like for milking...what's up with all that? Let's just confuse the hell outa some kiddies.