the un-sexy Super Bowl

Why? Why do people insist on using the term "sexy" to describe sporting events? They do it with their prognostications for sporting events too, which is also annoying. They say things like, "The Chargers are the sexy pick to go to the Super Bowl next year." and "This year's Superbowl doesn't have the sexy matchup that we hoped for." Is that description (dare I say it) sexy?

"Sexy" is not a term that should be used to describe sporting events...especially football! Some people who engage in sporting activities can be sexy, but the event itself is....well...not. Natalie Gulbis...sexy. Danica Patrick...sexy. Maria Sharapova...sexy. If you're female or a broke-butt mountain cowboy, Tom Brady, maybe...sexy. Byron Leftwich, maybe..se...no sorry, Byron. I tried. I can't quite stretch to get you in here. Nobody's asking you to take your shirt off for a magazine cover anytime soon, but I know there's somebody out there for you. David Garrard, maybe...sexy. Back to the point though, Superbowl XL...not sexy. It is also not not sexy. A football game and the word sexy don't belong in the same sentence! Babe-a-day over to the right is sexy. Hunk-a-day, which can be found at the same source...sexy, for those so inclined.

If you're a girl, describe the Super Bowl any way you like, but if you're a guy hanging out at your local sports bar talking to people you sort-a know, let me throw a little lumberyard advice your way. Don't go talking about the Super Bowl in terms of being sexy or not. It won't do much for your social standing, and people will create an inordinate amount of space between you and them.